You don’t owe anyone anything. Yes. So much yes.

My little girl happens to be beautiful. Strangers tell her this all the time. They comment on her eyes, her style, her general beauty.

She’s 3.

Today I had a long chat with her today about how she feels about hearing this from strangers all the time. I want her to KNOW that she doesn’t owe anyone anything either. I told her that, yes, she is beautiful. And yes, that can sometimes be nice to hear. But (a) she’s got more to the depth of her experience than simply being the brunt of a label, albeit a superficially nice one. And (b) she doesn’t have to accept that label going forward if she doesn’t feel like it.

Maybe I’m that weird parent that’s going to scar my child for life with this cynical adult advice. But maybe, just maybe, she will grow up realizing that how she feels and what she desires from the inside of her being is far more important than meeting some arbitrary standard imposed on her by the opinions of strangers.